Bjorn’s Skiing Haikus

The cold trail beckons,
I am at one with my skis.
Ouch! Lactate tests hurt…

-or-

Vicious blood sucker,
relishing painful lactates.
His name is Piotr.

(c’mon now, you can’t believe that he actually wants your lactate readings….he’s only out to get you back for the nasty things you’ve done to him. you poke fun at him one week, and suddenly it’s “i think we’re going to have lactates soon….”)

When I was in Sweden two years ago for the Swedish Biathlon Championships, I witnessed a relationship between one of my best friends, Kurt Farchmin, and a very special someone blossom like you only see in the movies. It tore Kurt’s heart up to leave, but he had to do it. I just couldn’t stand seeing Kurt in the battered shape he was in, so I decided to sing a little song about his pains to cheer him up. The song is printed below for your reading pleasure. I’d be willing to sing the you the song in person (and I’m sure Kurt would, too) if you asked me very nicely – Bjorn) ::listen in – 1.1Mb-.mp3

I’ve spent the best days of my life with you:
Days of love, days of laughter, but now I feel blue.
A tear is rolling down from my eye
Now I know that our love was based on a lie.

How could you be so mean?
Told me you were sixteen,
I’ll never stop blaming myself
For not seeing that you only were twelve…..

So tell me, How can I believe in love anymore
When I’ve been betrayed by the one I adore?
Tell me, how can I ever fall in love again?
Being hurt by a twelve year old woman….

Now I know the meaning of the phrase:
You should never ask a woman about her age
Because her heart will fall apart
If you ever catch a glimpse of her ID-card

The most beautiful girl I’ve seen
Told me she was sixteen.
It hurts me so: I found out too late
She was born in 1988….

So tell me, How can I believe in love anymore
When I’ve been betrayed by the one I adore?
Tell me, how can I ever fall in love again?
Being hurt by a twelve year old woman….

(But deep in my heart she means everything to me
And sometimes I wish that I’d told her
That even if her parents are planning to sue me
I’ll be back when she’s four years older!!)

Tell me, (Refrain)

****Thanks very much to Roar, M’Pete, and “Hot Tub” in Norway for help with lyrics and the tune. There is absolutely no way this song for Kurt could have happened without you guys. I’ll always be a fan! -Bjor